Dear Tony,

Why is it that most Black men (that is all I have knowledge on) don't include their mates in major decisions? Example: Taking a new job that requires you to travel out of state more than 2 or 3 days per week, buying a new house (no I will not be living there with him, and no he is not buying one because of his job). You see Tony I have been in a 5 year relationship with this man. I love him truly and don't want to end our relationship, and no I am not ready to get married, but my guy just made a major decision and did not take me and what I feel into consideration. I am trying not to put a damper on his excitement, however I don't like the situation and I really don't know if I will be able to deal with him being gone as often as his job will require. I am also concerned about his safety, flying as often as he will. I will be afraid, lonely, and upset each time he leaves. I don't know how to handle this and I am an emotional wreck.